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Friends...... by Williams - July 31st, 2014 09:09:04 AM
 
Sorry to let you guys know now,this isn't a rage rant but more of a somber one. I kinda need to let this out to somebody so I just decided to do it here. Well I'm a Junior in highschool now and I realized my journey is over and beginning at the same time. But what I really want to talk about is how much I've grown. I've grown from a shy nerd with no friends to a kid who has some friends! At first I was bullied and had no friends but I had all As. I didn't ever want to tell my parents because one thing my brother taught me when me and him was younger was to never be a tattletale...




I was bullied from kindergarten to 5th grade. My brother couldn't do much either since he's two years older than me. The bully was 4 years older than my brother. So my bully rode the same bus as me. Most people think about how they got rid of their bully but how I got rid of mine? My bully got expelled from school my 5th grade year because he fought the principal..... But I in 3rd grade was when I gained my first real friend! It was amazing! Then as I grew older I had smaller but more friendships! Well not friends because we never talked a lot to each other.... But when I made it to 5th grade I got my first B..... Your probably thinking what the hell is wrong with that guy? That's good! I know right.....But back then it was a big deal because grades were all I had.... By then I decided I was going to become a lawyer. But I met another true friend that happened to be my cousin in 5th grade! Boy I was happy!Then more people started noticing how funny I was but they never wanted to talk to me because I wore glasses. Then in 6th grade I got my first C. Once again my world was falling apart but again people were finally noticing me.... Then in 7th grade I met another friend. We're the troublesome three! My teacher told me to stay from them because they were trouble but I shrugged it off and kept showing my true colors! Even more people were noticing me!! Then in 8th grade I went back to As and Bs but this time I gained 3 more great friends that year!! People finally knew my name! I actually felt I wasn't in the shadows anymore!!! Life never felt so good..... I finally realized another dream I wanted to accomplish..... I want to become President!!!!! But my freshman year in highschool(9th grade)..... I got my first D and F....... But I gained a lot of friendships and met new people! I actually was a little popular! I almost failed a class though...... But I gained what I had been searching for my entire life....... To be noticed.... Then my 10th grade year I thought this wasn't me so I grew more like anti social but my grades didn't improve..... I even failed a class and didn't go to summer school..... I'm so confused who am I...... I still want to become president because I want world peace but another side of me is telling me you just want to noticed but on a larger scale...... But school is about to start again and it's my junior year so I hope I can turn it around but still keep the friendships!!! But I've been thinking...... Would I rather be the old me or the new me........ And I realized I would rather be the new me because I've created bonds that I've so wished for my entire life!!! I actually cried because I thanked God for how far he's brought me!!! When I graduate I'm going to miss all these bonds and friendships I've made!!! Most people will say we will keep in touch but the sad truth is that most of us will disappear gone on to live their life...... But sadly my future is in murky water.... My GPA is a 1.8...... There's probably not enough time for me to get into a good school to become a lawyer..... Lol who would want a president from a community college? I went from being the next big thing to being a waste of space.... Not living wise but education wise.... It's just I have no work ethic because everything came so easy for me! Now it's hard to study..... My parents are making me take regular classes but I don't want to....... I'm going to lose all of my great friendships.... I'm pathetic..... Risking my whole life away for friendships....... But thank you for whoever is reading this because I need advice.... Since I'm 16 some more experienced people have some advice for me..... I feel like my personality and everything about me is split in two... One side of me is about perfection excellence,and winning. While the other side is about being easy going and living in the moment..... Can some one please fucking help me!!!!! I don't know anymore...... Just someone please notice this because I need advice...... And here's my advice to people in school who feel like their outsiders and have nothing to live for! I've been through it! I've escaped the struggle! Trust me.... Your not as different as you think..... I have three pieces of advice to you.... If your in school.... One! Put a smile on your face! Two! Give out gum! Three! The most important one of all!!!!! Be yourself.....because if you be yourself somebody will like you for who you are....If you do these things you will have friends in no time.... That was my rant....
 

 FUPOC - July 28th, 2015 10:22:37 AM
Dude (or dudette..) Don't beat yourself up about ANYTHING...It's not pathetic to prioritize what's important to you at the time over something not so important. People do it all the time. I know a couple who used to be squatters and sell weed who are now a lawyer and a company director. I also hear of loads of people who start off working really hard and money and power is everything and end up living a simple life in the woods. So friendships are really really important at all stages of your life and if you have no friendships that takes over your mindset and you did the right thing in prioritizing that. When you're ready to study hard again you will, or you might suddenly not want to be a lawyer or president, you might want to travel the world working here and there and making new fleeting friends as you go, or feed elephants in a zoo, or cut hair, or be a real estate agent, you could do anything and you are entitled to change your mind as many times as you like throughout your whole life. You might feel that you have fucked up by not working hard right now, but don't worry, everything is retrievable and you obviously have two really worthy attributes, the persuit of excellence and the pursuit of easy living. Whatever you do it seems to me you will be a success in it but you won't get super stressed out about it, 'cause you have a good balance there.
 


 
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